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Tuesday, February 9, 2010

i got diagnosed with long qt interval and i'm scared to death

It's Random Tuesday and I'm sharing again.  I was heading to a friends house to watch the Olympic torch relay running through Abbey. We got out of the car. Instantly I felt dizzy. I mean extremely dizzy and had to sit down because I felt like I was going to hurl (bad)!

This wasn't the first time I had felt this way. In fact I had - had quite a few dizzy spells in the past three months where I felt ill and everything started spinning around me like when I was in my twenties and drank too much at the bar.

This was just the first time it felt this bad. Like something was really and truly wrong and it scared me.

We headed to the rotary stadium for the celebration of athletes as the Olympic torch was being run in by Gerry Swan, hero of Abbotsford. The kids were all excited as we had up front seats right on the line to watch. Gamer was supposed to meet his teammates there from the Bulldogs, Abbotsford hockey but only a few came. Other athletes were there though so it was all good.
The boys waited over 45 minutes to get their faces painted

Watching the torch come in and sharing that with the boys and FD was a lot of fun and a once in a lifetime experience. The boys has a blast.  They were excited having their pics taken with the Olympic mascots and I tried hard to have a good time.

I was moody though. I felt off and I just wanted to go home, although I tried having fun. By the time we got home I was exhausted. I asked DH to bring down the bed so the boys and I could camp out. Mommy wanted some snuggles. It's one of my most favorite things to do.

I was asleep.

Something was wrong.

I couldn't move my arms.

I had pins and needles everywhere.

This was it and I knew it!

I got up and went to the bathroom and immediately called for Gamer to get daddy. FD came down and just as he turned the corner to the bathroom. I stared up at him and I said "this is it!" and I violently threw up all over the floor in front of him. Gamer called 911.

I was having a heart attack!

The ambulance came and rushed me in to the hospital where I spent the next four hours being monitored on a heart machines and had four EKG's done along with blood work.

It wasn't a heart attack. It was a pre-heart attack. A warning so to speak to tell me to get off my fat ass, take control of my life, quit smoking and eating shit that should never enter my mouth. To do something about my life! Because I have my kids and my husband and I want to be here.

It was a wake up call!

The doctor came in and explained on the EKG they discovered I had prolonged QT interval which basically means there is gap to how my heart is functioning and firing when I breath.

Is it dangerous?


I am going to see a cardiologist where they will give me a holster monitor and run other heart tests to determine whether my anti-depressant is what caused it or whether or not I was born with it like the doctor thinks.

However he is taking me off my Celexa, weaning me. I normally take 40mg and have been asked to cut it in half and then again in half over a period of twenty days until further testing can be done.

So there I am sitting in the hospital bed, an iv sticking out of me when the doctor says: This is serious. You need to not get excited about stuff. Don't get anxious and keep your anxiety levels low. Don't do strenuous physical exercise or worry too much about things or get overly emotional because all of things can be triggers for the heart.

Ummmmmm WTF? Hello jack ass I am on medication for bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, and I have both a husband and son with special needs I look after. Stress and Anxiety are an everyday part of my life. How the hell am I supposed to become Zen all of sudden?

Anyhow that is where I am sitting right now. I feel like shit. I feel like I can't breath. I'm scared shitless I won't wake up when I go to sleep. I'm terrified to leave my kids alone and be without them. You name it I'm feeling the emotion.

I have lost 21lbs since January. I quit smoking yesterday, taking only a few puffs here and there and even that is disgusting to me. A big change since I usually suck back 25-30 nic sticks a day. I know I'm bad.

But I'm going to be better.

I'm going to change things.

I'm going to eat better.

Now I just have to get past being scared all the time.


I am Harriet on February 9, 2010 at 1:55 PM said...

I hate getting dizzy spells. Hang in there.

Happy RTT!

stephanie on February 10, 2010 at 1:18 AM said...

I am glad you have this blog now i can see what exactly is going on i was shocked as hell when fd told me what happened and i am sorry i missed your call today i called back but you were busy. Try your best to think calm lavender thoughts i am placing a white light and mirrors around you. take care of you lady and i will find you tomorrow


Steve Gorman said...

You'll do ok, you got the fire and will to get better. I'll pray for you

Victoria Pepper said...

I happened upon your blog, looking for another Mom that might have been recently diagnosed with Long QT syndrome. I was "prediagnosed" in January and genetically diagnosed in March. 2 of my 4 children have been tested. My oldest two boys are 23 and 21 have to go sign up to get tested as they are over 18... one doesn't plan on being tested as he is a college football player and doesn't want to know. My 14yr. old son was negative for LQTS but my 8 year old daughter was positive. My life has been turned upside down. I read more of your blog...its great and you remind me of myself so very much. Just wondering if you found out anything else on your Long QT? Are they doing genetic testing? Would love to hear I have felt pretty much alone in all of this.... Victoria

JP Shaw on June 11, 2010 at 11:01 PM said...

Hi Victoria, so far nothing has really changed except I take better care of myself and I am on gravol at night to help with the anxiety which can increase my heart rate.

I actually discovered my Long QT was inherited from my mother my boys are okay though, still young and eat right and exercise lots.

I'm sorry about your upside situation, it's scary I know. I wish I had more information for you. I spent a lot of time online and researching. If there is a group for support out there use it, it will come in handy on the down days.

Remember as much as you feel it. You aren't alone!

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