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Showing posts with label friday frustrations. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friday frustrations. Show all posts

Thursday, April 29, 2010

friday frustrations: HST screws Canadians but the fight is far from over!


You knew it was coming.

You knew they would do it.

I mean how else can they pay for the Olympics and send billions of dollars to Haiti for earthquake relief, meanwhile millions of BC residents suffer on the brink of homeless without the ability to pay for hydro, rent, basic needs and our seniors might as well pull up a curb and paint their spot on it because that is where they will find themselves in the next few years.

The HST law was passed Thursday but the fight against the Harmonized Sales Tax which is to be set at 12% across the bar is far from over.  A grassroots petition led by former premiere Bill Vander Zalm is still growing with support.  The question is what can they really accomplish?

SIGN THE PETITION AND SEE....

I signed the petition against the HST which was pushed forward as a way to help economical growth in an already struggling economy and yet all it will do is push those of us already at poverty level barely struggling, even further down the hole they have dug for us as most items which were originally exempt by taxes are now being taxed across the board.

BC joins Ontario and the 3 Maritime provinces with the HST tax.  Yeah us!  What a crock of shit!  It makes me sick to my stomach that our government is pulling more of this crap, especially when everything costs so much as it is.

My niece is in the hospital right now.  She is very sick.  My brother had to go to work, and my sister in law as well so they can pay their rent, and instead of staying in the hospital with their daughter they are shifting off because they cannot afford to be with their sick child, and to top it off they had to pay for parking the entire time she's been there or risk getting towed!

My own father drove himself to the hospital because he didn't want to pay the ambulance fee of $50 when he was having a heart attack!

There is something very seriously wrong with what Country and it needs to be fixed.  People need to stand up and say no to the HST.  We need to fight it even if we feel we cannot win, we need to fight and let our government know we will not tolerate this kind of behavior making choices for us that concern us, leaving us no voice!

Elections BC did put a stop to our government spending our hard earned money to apparently "inform" us about the HST and for trying to put a stop to what Vander Zalm is trying to do who already has 145,000 signatures and only needs 10% of each provincial riding from registered voters.

We need to keep the petition moving forward so we can vote this down.  We need to show the government we have a voice!

You can read more on the HST here from CTV.


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Friday, March 12, 2010

slow internet connection makes for friday frustrations


ConversationsWithMoms:Every day Conversations with a Mom Blog


It's Friday, time for some frustrations according to Conversations with Moms, and this Friday my biggest frustration has been my internet connection.

We recently switched internet providers because I could not stand Telus's lack of customer service, that and FD (Forgetful Dad) wanted satelitte tv, more channels, more sports, you know how men are.

So we went with Bell expressvu, and they have something called portable internet. At first I thought (wow!) internet that is portable. You mean I can take it with me? Anywhere I want?

Well almost anywhere. The internet works off towers, so where ever there are towers and a signal, there is internet to be had in Canada. So what caused my frustration?

Based on where we live, a tower was like right around the corner, but these damn oak trees and tall buildings were preventing me from getting a signal in my home. That is until we found one--in the upstairs bedroom of all places.

So--FD and I took apart the main computer station to move the desk, my files, drawers and everything I need to work upstairs. I mean I need the internet and with this fancy new laptop I have to get the job done, my favorite new toy by the way, I had to plug the modem into a wireless router so I can be downstairs with the kids if I need to work on the go.

I wish these things didn't have to be so damn difficult, but our only other internet option was a bell stick which runs off cell towers and can cost up to $100 per month. OUCH! That is too much.

Right now we are paying $22 for internet, the cheapest ever and now that I have things working accordingly it's super fast and I now I have signal all the over house, even outside if I want.

So I'm now back online after being off for a couple days, battling with this. Funny how important being online has become to me, work and all, but also to keep in touch with other people important in our lives.

If you participate in Friday Frustrations then please take a minute to visit Conversations with Moms.

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Friday, February 26, 2010

student drivers need better teachers : friday frustrations


Okay I realize the cartoon above depicts a form of racism.  It's not truly meant that way.  I love people of all color and race.  My nieces and nephews are Asian and I'm the whitest girl in Canada.  Trailer park really.

However, that being said.  I have a beef!

Lately whenever we are on the road all I see are East Indian or Asian instructors teaching student drivers and based on what I see.  NONE OF THEM CAN DRIVE!

When I went down to the Motor Vehicle Branch and asked them why student drivers are being told to drive 20km in a 50km zone through the city.  I was told that isn't right.  You can actually fail your exam if you go slower and not go the correct speed through the speed zone required.

So why is it whenever we get stuck behind a student driver - and oh we get stuck behind them A LOT because FD seems to have radar for anyone who can't drive.  Why are they going so slow?

It's annoying!


It's frustrating!

We already know how to drive and yet are being punished to sit in a classroom behind a student who apparently is still just learning.

I think our government needs to rethink it's student driving program and instead of putting these ppl on the road.  They should use the mission speedway when it's not in use for driving practice and not put these (slower than molasses assholes) on the road to cause accidents until they can go the speed limit and drive effectively.

Oh and by the way to all teachers (not just the East Indian and Asian ones) the new cell phone law is in effect.  So get the fuck off your phones!  You are suppose to be teaching these helpless individuals how to drive, not talking to your wife or girlfriend while they are suppose to be paying attention to kids, cars and small squirrels crossing the street.  (WE HAVE SQUIRRELS!)

You can cause a fucking accident!  In fact I so appreciated watching several of you rear end a helpless old lady trying to peek over her wheel and hit some kid crossing the street because you were on your phone last week.  Yeah that was fun!

Maybe the students should be teaching the teachers and the teachers should turn in their report cards and take lessons themselves.  Either way -- STAY THE HELL OFF OUR ROADS UNTIL YOU CAN LEARN TO DRIVE!  AND DRIVE PROPERLY!


If you participate in Friday Frustrations head on over to Conversations with Moms and post your link there.  Don't forget to leave me some comment luv!  Yeah that includes you, and you and you.  I see you in the back hiding.

ConversationsWithMoms:Every day Conversations with a Mom Blog


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Friday, February 19, 2010

friday frustrations: conversations with my computer


It's Friday! Whooooo Hooooo TGIF everyone and thanks to conversations with moms I get to vent away this morning all my Friday woes.

Dear Computer: I want you to know how much I adore having you. However, you've been slow lately corresponding with me. It seems almost as if you don't want to spend any time with me doing all the fun things we love to do, like web design, blogging and playing farmville. What can I do to make you feel better? I've helped you get rid of your colds. I've babied you by removing all your extra coats of clutter, giving you lots of free space to run around. What else can I do?

Dear JP: There is nothing you can do. I'm tired. Can't you understand I hate farming and going to your cafe. It gives me a headache which is why I shut down for a nap. I need to SLEEP! You over work me daily. You don't care about my feelings. You clutter my bedroom, leaving your games and toys lying around expecting me paint.net when you want and answer all your emails while you are out. It's tiring and I just feel you are being unfair!

Dear Computer: I am sorry you feel that way. I had no idea. I realize you are not at the top of your game. I realize age is setting in and perhaps I am asking too much from you lately. But I have jobs to do. I have people counting on me. People counting on you. Isn't there a way you can find it in yourself to push yourself just a bit? I promise to pick up my games and not leave them lying around. I promise to paint only three days a week instead of daily. I promise not to curse at you or take you for granted. Just please find your second wind and help me out a little. I can't afford to replace you and I don't really want to. So what do you say.

Dear JP: CTRL + ALT + DELETE!


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Friday, January 29, 2010

god works in mysterious ways: friday frustrations


Well it's Friday, which means it's time for Friday Frustrations and a recap for the week plus today.

This week went by fairly quickly and we had some ups and downs. I was a fair bit more emotional this week about life, our family and Pickleboy who I am going to rename to Mr. Moody lol.

So Yesterday FD (forgetful dad) got up early and went down to the Abbey News because he wanted to enter the contest to win four tickets to the Abbotsford Bull Riding that is going to be in town this weekend.

Well wouldn't you know it; he won!

But he didn't win at the same time. I know you are going Huh? That makes no sense. Well apparently they call us this morning and FD missed the call so they moved on to the next person. He was soooooooo disappointed.

Anyhow, Anne down at the paper called us back and offered us tickets to the Heat game. I was like: no thanks since our life revolves around hockey already and we do the 50/50 draw at the heat games to pay for Gamerboy's season.

But then I realized WAIT!

GB is playing on Feb 8th at the Heat game during intermission. His team was one of the ones that got chosen and if we want to see him play we had to purchase tickets for all of us at $16.00 a pop! Money we just didn't have.

So I called Anne back and she got us the tickets for the heat game so we can watch our son play and meet the team. GB is so excited we will all be there to cheer him on in net.

Thanks Anne for coming through. I guess God works in mysterious ways because if FD hadn't lost the contest for the bull riding we wouldn't have won the tickets to the heat game lol.

If you participate in Friday Frustrations then head on over to Conversations With Moms and post your link.
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Friday, January 22, 2010

i think i need some down time: friday frustrations



TGIF! And I mean that this week. I really do. I love Friday's especially when I've had a long week, and let me tell you this week has been long. So many things happened it would just take me too long to explain. So I'm going to list them and not in any particular order of frustration or happiness.

No sleep at all this week for myself
Pickleboy didn't sleep well either. His legs were very sore
Gamerboy won his first hockey game in net. That was exciting
All hell broke loose on Grey's Anatomy and Izzy came back (blech!)
I had no offers for blogging this week... what a drag!
Finished a redesign on my site and I think it looks great but I'm bias lol
Too many fights this week between Forgetful and Gamer which drove me bleeping! nuts.
Discovered a new site worth checking out (The sleep talking man) totally hilarious!
We have three spoons left in our house. I'm posting on this today
Forgetful has volleyball this weekend and Gamer has two hockey games which means lots of running around for mom
All in all it was an eventful week that made me totally exhausted.  I think tonight I'm going to crack a bottle of wine, kick back and wallow in my depressive mood. 


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Friday, December 18, 2009

friday frustrations: casual friday



TGIF!!! And boy am I glad it's here. I've been up since 4 am because pickle boy wouldn't go to sleep and didn't end up going to sleep until close to 3 in the morning. He kept having night terrors. Always fun.

I did get some great news. Actually it was an early Christmas Present from a friend (not to be named) a video camera so I can record life events, something to which I have wanted for a very long long time. It made me cry.

I didn't cry because of the gift but because this friend knew what having one meant to me. Having a husband with a brain injury who forgets all those little moments can be difficult. Life can be hard and when those joyous times erupt, the kids Christmas concerts, achievements they accomplish, sporting events they play. It's nice to be able to now record those events so that DH can recall them when his brain refuses to allow him those precious memories.

We haven't quite finished our Christmas shopping. Almost, but not quite. I'm glad Walmart is open until Midnight. PB (Pickleboy) doesn't do well with his Aspergers in large crowds, so it's nice to be able to take him out to finish up the holiday stuff when less people are around.

Is everyone else ready for Christmas? Do you have your tree up? Festive lights about? That is one thing DH still has to do and with ohhhhhh what is it? Only six more days until Christmas we should have our outside lights up by Easter.

Hope everyone has a great Holiday if I don't post before then and happy Friday!

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Friday, December 4, 2009

friday frustrations: busy hockey weekend


ConversationsWithMoms:Every day Conversations with a Mom Blog

I can't believe it's Friday already. Time seems to be flying by (of course) with Christmas just around the corner and me, I haven't even done my cards yet!

That is something I am going to do this weekend, that and a few other things. We have a busy (hockey) weekend with the bulldogs but thankfully just practices and no games.

My lack of organization made it so Gamerboy missed Tuesday's game which he was suppose to play in Chilliwack. Can you say oops? Ya, having a ten year old refuse to talk to you because your mom skills went out the window when normally you can't shut him up without duct tape. It isn't too pretty - lol.

The boys have practice at 6am and 7am and then goalie clinic at noon. Then DH has to go and stand around the heat game at 4pm to sell 50/50 tickets which helps to pay for our son's season. It's all worth though, but that leaves Pickleboy and I to fend for ourselves.

Here is my listy of todo's

write out my Christmas cards and deliver them
make cookies
decorate the gifts I have already done
wrap presents
clean out the laundry room
clean the upstairs
vacuum the carpets because I can see little people living between the fibers
mop the floors
clean under the bathroom sink
go to mill lake for a walk with PB
Christmas crafts!
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On another note.  I don't feel good.  So getting things done this weekend should be pleasant.  I think I have an ear infection or maybe a sinus infection.  My glands are swollen.  My ears ache.  My teeth hurt so bad I want to take plyers and just yank them out.

Night time is the worst because everything just hurts.  Mix that with my anxiety and the fact that I know I'm breathing but can never EVER find my heart beat and you've got one cranky mommy with no sleep!

However I am going to try to enjoy myself this weekend.  DH came home today and said I bought you something.  I bought me some hot chocolate and it nearly made me cry.  I know silly but when your husband has a brain injury and forgets everything and then suddenly remembers you.  Ya it's big time thanks for me.

If you participate in Friday Frustrations head on over to Conversations with Moms and post yourself there so other can enjoy reading about your Friday.
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Friday, October 23, 2009

friday frustrations: a week of decisions




It's been a long week of decisions for both Forgetful Dad and I concerning our family, which is why I'm adding it to this weeks post for Friday Frustrations from Conversations with Moms.

First on the front was the sale of our television.  Yes we sold our tv.  Our Sony 46" beautiful flat screen LCD has now gone to a new home and we are saddened by the fact, but in retrospect all things are REPLACEABLE and we will eventually get a new one.

Why did we sell it?

Well Gamerboy is playing hockey this season and of course being ten years old he chose the most expensive position GOALIE and hockey does not come cheap.  So not cheap in fact that we sold the tv to help pay off some bills so we could manage the season financially, since it cost about five  hundred to register him, another four hundred for the equipment (that's on a deal through a friend) and another four hundred for tournaments, one of which is out of town late in March.  Good thing we have time to save up for that one so we can pay for boarding and food while on the road.

It's worth it though.

It's always worth it, especially when it's for your kids.
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On a Serious Note:

Other decisions we had to make this week, or are still making concerns the H1N1, which there are tons of conversations on Facebook concerning the matter.  Do we or don't we get our kids vaccinated?

Forgetful Dad and I spoke about this at great lengths when coming to the same conclusion that we are both leary when it comes to the H1N1 vaccine.  What are the long term side effects?  Do we want our children to be used as guinea pigs?  Is it really safe?

It's not that we don't want to protect the kids.  Shit Gamer has already had H1N1 which was scary enough, keeping his isolated for over a week and trying to stay calm, wearing masks, while I prayed that neither FD or I got it, never mind the baby (pickleboy) whose only three.




I want my kids to be safe.  But what is even scarier is that here (in the Fraser Valley) there have been more deaths.  The latest being a middle aged man in his thirties.  A young girl of 26 years old in the mission died last week from the virus and she had no health complications or concerns at the time of her death.  She went into the hospital and was dead two days later.

It scares the crap out of me!



I laid in Forgetful Dad's arms and I cried.  Yes tears because I cannot even comprehend what is happening.  "I don't want to die of the flu" I whispered to him with my heart chalked so full of fear.  It's not exactly how I want to go.  How I want my boys to know I went.

Our mom died of the flu... WTF????



We worry all the time about strangers taking our kids.  We worry about someone breaking into our home and hurting us or the kids, destroying our things.  We worry and teach our children to watch out for cars and while we drive we say a prayer to be safe on the road.

Why do we have to worry about a runny nose, fever and aches and pains possibly taking our lives????

Because we've fucked ourselves.  That's why!  We are screwing this world with all the crap we are doing and we just don't seem to care enough to do anything about it.  The seasons are changing and they aren't what they are suppose to be anymore.  Winters are getting colder.  Summers are getting hotter, creating fire hazards where there shouldn't be.  We spend countless  hours worrying about what we eat, making sure it's boiled, bagged and cooked properly before consuming it so we don't get sick.



Anyhow I've bitched enough for today.  Thank God it's Saturday tomorrow.  As for the vaccine... I think we are going to wait and get more information.  Or as much information as we can get as to what and how the medicine will affect us in the long run.

All I know is that I used to be scared of what went bump in the night.  Now I'm afraid to catch a cold.  There is just something fucking wrong with that scenario, don't you think?
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Friday, October 16, 2009

friday frustrations: what a mess!


I hate housework as you all know because I've bitches about it enough on here.

No matter how hard I try I can never keep up. Dishes and laundry, cooking, toys all over, blankets strewn across the floor. It is never ending and I especially notice how dirty things get on Friday's.



It is the weekend and I hate weekends when the house is a mess. I never feel like cleaning either and of course the nous seemed aimed to contribute to the growing pile of yuck needling our home.









One thing is for certain I don't care if it takes all weekend. This house is going to be clean, even if it only stays that way for five minutes. I will take it and enjoy it for every second I can.

if you participate in Friday frustrations make sure you visit conversations with moms.

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Friday, October 2, 2009

friday frustrations: four babies made me laugh




It was a very long dealing with FMEP and them taking our money.  We finally got that dealt with.  Pickleboy and Gamer both had their ups and downs, joys of dealing with special needs and rain all week long keeping the boys bummed.

I finished my interview which I will posting with Daddy Digest hopefully this week sometime.  He's awesome!  But I blogged very little.  My computer kept crapping out on me and I swear I would take a sledge hammer to it if I didn't need it for working at home.  It's a piece of shit  garbage, but it's all I have.  If any of you actually know how to win a laptop for real let me know.  Has to be open to Canadian residents though.

Forgetful dad had a busy week with volleyball, and because I was feeling ill (being off my meds) Celexa for bipolar disorder, let me just say "I'm sorry guys mommy was a beast from a hell and screamed at you for you smiling.  I didn't mean it --LOL!"  I will be back on my meds come Monday so hopefully I can make it through the weekend.

I spent a couple hours this week farming, roller coastering, planting veggies and playing on FB (Facebook) during breaks between writing.  Nanowrimo starts soon so I'm trying to gather my writing and decide what project I am going to attempt.  50,000 words in a month isn't easy lol.

I needed a laugh after this week and Youtube of course provided me with one.  I think I peed a little watching this, it was so frigging funny.  Enjoy!  And have a great weekend everyone!



If participate in Friday Frustrations then please head on over to conversations with moms and post your link there.  Don't forget to leave me a comment.  You comment and I follow.
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Friday, September 25, 2009

friday frustrations: bc government knows how to screw you where it hurts!




I am fuming mad right now, like downright, grab a gun, shoot a person in the foot kinda angry!  And so in general traditional of my weekly memes I only thought it necessary to gripe about it here on Friday Frustrations, though this goes beyond frustrated!

Today we went to the bank only to discover a hold on my husband's account from FMEP (Family Maintenance Enforcement Program).  He is behind on his child maintenance payments by $2000 (arrears).  My husband is on a very limited disability and was when I met him.  Due to his motorcycle accident when he was 18 which left him unable to remember things day to day.  Life was difficult for him and he has always tried his best to keep up and remember to pay for his son.  A child he has very limited contact with but is still his responsibility yes.

However they didn't garnish his wages or even take his money.  They put the hold on our account and all the monies that get direct deposited in it which included my child tax credit and our son's disability.  Now we can't pay our rent or bills, our vehicle is going to be taken away due to this and nobody seems to care.

Trace (Pickleboy) was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy at birth.  We moved away from my husband's child to move closer to Children's Hospital due to all the testing and rehabilitation he required to sustain a more normal life for him.
 

We live in subsidized housing and I could not believe that the Canadian government has given FMEP the right to STEAL money from children.  Money I use every month to buy diapers, medications for Trace's legs because they hurt every day of his life due to walking and stiffness.  Clothes and food for the boys to eat, and school supplies for our son.  Money used to pay bills, like hydro and telephone and rent for our unit we live in.

How could they?

Well they can and I was completely devastated by this.  I am angry right now.  That is my money, and yes in marriage things are shared.  But I do not feel it is right to take money used to protect and feed and keep my children safe to pay for his child. 

Everyone keeps saying -- well that's the government for you.  But that isn't good enough.  FMEP states they are only really allowed to take 50% of the money but have frozen the rest so I cannot even access it to do what I need to do in order to survive.

I don't know what we will do.  I don't know how we will fix this.  My husband was supposed to call them but forgot to due to his brain injury and if he doesn't tell me about it I cannot help to guide him to remember.  Every day is a struggle for us both mentally, physically and emotionally.

I didn't need this, too.

But I guess things happen for a reason.  I am now selling our things, things I purchased after saving long before I got married in order to pay his debt.  I spent the afternoon crying but realize I need to move forward in order to figure things out.  Things are replaceable.  My husband's heart is not and right now it's broken because he's blaming himself for not remembering and for being unable to work.

He's an amazing person and loves his son.  He wants to pay for him, even though he doesn't get to see him.  He knows it's his responsibility.  Still it's hard to not get angry when my son's fathers (my ex) owes me like 8 grand in arrears and I get nothing!  But here they are going after a man on a disability and all this after they over charged him on his child support payments to begin with!

I can't wait for Saturday!

If you participate in Friday Frustrations please head over to Conversations with Moms and post your link there.  Also don't forget to send me some comment luv!  I could use a good word or two today... thanks.
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Friday, September 4, 2009

friday frustrations: fears and tears





It's Friday which means it's time to be frustrated.

Wait!  That doesn't sound right, does it?  Ha ha ha, well it's a weekly thing.  You know every Friday I post what ailes me or gets my heart down in the dumps.  You can too, and send your linky forward so other people visit and read your post.

This Friday is especially emotionally for me because a lot of stuff has happened over the past week and with the kids going back to school and PB (pickleboy) starting pre-school on Tuesday.  I'm a big bawl of tears lately.

He goes to school at 9:30 till 10:30.  It's a good thing there is a parent room downstairs.  Not because I'm worried about him.  I'm worried about me.  Well okay I'm a little worried about him.  Will he listen to the teacher?  Is he going to have a melt down?  How will they deal with it?  Will they yell at him?  He hates it when people yell at him?  Will they understand his disabilities?  Will they even care about him while he's there?

All these things have plagued my mind this past week as we approach the day for him to leave me.  That's what he's doing, leaving me.  He is my last baby.  I've been totally focused on his life and needs for the past three years more than I ever was with Gamer, only because PB needed it.

Childrens Hospital and meetings with Child Development over and over.  Occupational Therapists, speech and more.  It's been a long road.  Now he's ready to interact with others, though he still has troubles.  Biting for instance is a big one.  That and not liking certain materials touching him or near him.  Letting go is never easy.

Speaking of letting go.  I need to stop getting so upset when nobody visits my blog, despite me visiting theirs.

When I started blogging I thought it went on the honor system.  I visit yours and you visit mine.  I partake in your weekly hop and you come and post a link to help me boost my readers.  But I've since learned it's not.

I have several blogs I read daily, not because I want them to visit me or give me comment luv but because I really enjoy reading what they have to say.  Whether it's on parenting, life in general or just randomness.  I love reading my favs.

But yesterday when I tried something new and failed miserably.  It was a kick in the gut and I realized I  have no friends lol.  No bloggy ones anyhow.

Maybe they don't like how I write.  Maybe they don't like me?  How could they not like me?  I'm likable, aren't I?


All I can say is I'm glad the week is over and I can begin again after the weekend.  I am not going to stop posting or give up even if nobody comes to see me.  I can't.  I enjoy what I do too much.  And for those who do leave me comments to say hi or they've enjoyed something I have written.  Thank you.  You have no idea how much it means to me.


If you wish to participate in Friday Frustrations please go to Conversationswithmom.com and learn how.  You can grab their button and post it on your sidebar and join the fun.
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Friday, July 24, 2009

friday frustrations: nothing ever works out




Oh yeah it's Friday, well techniqually it's Sat but I'm doing Friday's post a day late and posting so you think I did it on Friday (sneaky eh?)

Ya whatever!

If you are a FF participant then head over to conversations with moms and post will ya. They love it when you do that, and don't forget to give me some comment luv. I could use a little right now.

Nothing ever works out the way it's supposed to.

It really doesn't and I truly fecking hate the big boot to the face life throws at me sometimes.

We were planning this big vacation to go away, up to PG to visit my inlaws and go to my husbands highschool 20 year reunion. We couldn't go because of lack of funds.

We are supposed to pick up my stepson and have him for two weeks, which we still are and are looking forward to it, but I had all things planned to do with the kids.

Those plans are gone now.

Why? Because of a lack of funds.

It just seems we can't keep up with the bills we are paying, car payments, house insurance, food, clothing for the kids, household supplies BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH... my fecking head hurts just thinking about it!

It's friday night and I don't have a pot to piss in as my dad would say. Okay actually I do but I'm using it to cook spaghetti and hot dogs (our grandious) meals we can afford. Nice eh?

It's just depressing and I hate being a downer and don't want this to be a poor me bitch fest, but it's sucks watching people around who have money blow it or throw it in my face, while the peeps I love (like my parents) are struggling because dad lost his job.

I don't know I realize life is more than money. It really is. I have my kids whom I love, friends I adore, family I can't live without and those are the important things in life.

It just sucks when you hear your kids "Mommy can I have a slurpee?" Cost 1.09 to get and my oldest says to my youngest...

"Not today buddy, don't ask mommy okay. I'll make you a cool blue juice when we get home."

And I see that look in my ten year olds eyes. The disappointment we are so broke we can't even buy frozen pop for them to drink. Not that they need it. It just hurts you know?

I can't wait for Saturday!


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Friday, July 17, 2009

friday frustrations: a week without SM, boys drive me crazy, planning our trip.



TGIF !!!!! And boy this week I'm glad it surely is. It's been a very long week both emotionally and financially for the clan here.

For starters, my bff SHOELESSMOMMY went away to bible camp for the week, leaving me and sparkee to drink coffee and smoke alone (without her) which just wasn't the same.

Not that SPARKEE and I don't have fun together because trust me we do, and I sooooooooo look forward to my girl time with the gals. I've been truly enjoying my new friendships lately.

My other friend T also went away and she's been gone like forever! I hope she is having a good time though as it was a much needed vaca for her. Everyone I know and love though seems to be dangling on holidays and it's making me look forward to us leaving this dump place we call home.

I don't mean to say Abbey isn't a nice place. It just seems every time I turn on the news or read the paper someone is doing something awful to someone else.

Like recently (over the past week) an elderly lady was mugged in broad daylight. Two young men, apparently higher than God stole her money and shoved her face into the bus stop post, hit her a couple of times and then when she proceeded to go into a seizure -- they left!!!!



They could have at least phoned the paramedics annoymously. I mean shit if you are going to rob someone that old at least have the heart to make sure you don't take their life. This poor woman is now recovering but afraid to leave her house. It makes me sick inside!

------------------> On another note the boys have been driving me up the wall or rather Gamerboy has. I mean PB (pickleboy) has just been himself, you know whiny and always needing something in his demanding three year old fashion.

GB though is a different story. He's been feeling the friendship loss bug as much as I have with several of his friends leaving for vaca and he has nobody really to play with right now. So each morning he wants to play PS2 and he asks like ten times a day if he can game.

Now I have a rule when it comes to video games. Maybe I'm too strict I don't know. But when school was in session the rule was no video games during the week and on weekends he was only allowed to play for one hour each day, to which he really didn't like.

Now that summer is here I thought for sure with the warm weather hitting us full frontal he'd be outside basking in the sun and having fun. But nooooooooo he wants to be inside battling spidy's evil bad guys or racing Jimmy J on the Nascar circut.

So, I had to sit down and have a talk with him.

He explained he was bored so today we went out and washed the car. I sprayed him with the hose and we had a water fight. It was a ton of fun. I also told him the rules, even though it is summer and his bed time has been extended an hour from nine to ten. Video game time isn't going to change.

We are leaving for PG in less than two weeks and going to his grandparents house on four acres of land with no gaming systems in site.

"Yeah so let me get it all out of my system now, mom. Then I'll be good when I see Gammie."

Yeah okay that's his mentality. Gotta give it to the kid for trying to sway me though but I didn't bite. I told him to read a book or work on his writing. He also has to finish his blog post for this week, which didn't make him too happy because I'm making him write them out before I help him type on the computer his posts. Somebody has to help the poor kid improve his chicken scratch.

---------------------------------> On an up note DH and I have decided to host HELL'S KITCHEN party nights at our house which should be fun. The new season begins on Tuesday and I cannot wait!

We are going to cook a new meal for our party guests each week and then watch the show. It should be a blast.

Anyhoo I've gotta run. Got a ton of laundry to do and Jo for CD (Child Development) is coming in the morning to see PB to assess whether he needs extra help in pre-school or not in September and lord knows I'm not going to be cohearant in the morning to discuss his issues.

Have a great weekend everyone!


If you participate in FRIDAY FRUSTRATIONS then please head over to conversations with moms and post your link there. Don't forget to send me some comment luv!!!! And I'll luvvvvv you back I swear.


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Friday, July 10, 2009

friday frustrations: no help for seniors bc


Like everyone else suffering with the economic crunch, so are my parents. My dad lost his job after working his ass off for several years (like forever) and when it happened it was one of the worst things to ever happen to them.
sunsetImage by kingstongal via Flickr

My pop is 57 or 58 years old, I stopped counting because he will always be 25 to me, young and my daddy. Yes I am a daddy's girl and I grew up watching my father work like a horse day in and day out, sometimes straight where we wouldn't see him, just to make ends meet and keep my mother and us three kids going.

Medically now at his age he should be in great shape but isn't. He suffered a heart attack a year or so ago, and has rheumatoid arthritis running through his body. My mother also suffered a heart attack (very young) over ten years ago and has already had triple bypass surgery among the other ailing diseases (diabetes, cataracts, lung disease, broken arteries, polymyalga) you name it she most likely suffers from it.

Yet these are supposed to be their golden years.

Us kids are all grown up. We have kids of our own and are all trying to survive financially. This is the time they are supposed to be going on vacation and loving life, not groveling for help. Yet that is exactly what they are being forced to do.

Dad applied for EI (employment insurance) since he got laid off due to cut backs. I mean he paid into it for years, so it only makes sense he apply for help for the daily necessities in life like rent, hydro, food, medications in order to survive.

Now dad got severance of course. So EI made him use it. God forbid they allow someone a chance to get a little ahead after they've had the rug pulled out from under them. Nawww our government doesn't like to that, keep em poor is our motto up in here in the sticks.

Three months salary means three months of severance. My parents lost their vehicle because they couldn't of course afford to pay the monthly amount now that pop wasn't working. And mom hasn't worked in years due to her disabilities. So they gave it back (whole other story which is just ugly if you ask me) dealing with Carfinco the company that financed them (the basasturds!) treated them like crap.

Dad won't get any money until August and food is running short, and they still have meds to buy. So EI informs them (now) not when he applied to go to Income Assistance (another government) agency to get financial aid until his EI comes in.

Mom is totally upset about all this. She's depressed and I can understand why; however I've been through it (having been an assistance) leech myself. That's what they call us, people who apparently milk the government for money when they should be working.

It doesn't matter if you left a spouse who beat you and need to get back on your feet, or lost a job. It doesn't matter if you are a senior and can't afford to live on a pension that pays less than half the cost of our actual living here in BC. It doesn't matter if you need medications and can't afford to buy them (so the only choice) is to die because without these meds you're basically screwed.

Going to welfare is about as fun as having a root canal done while waiting a bus stop crowded with obscene gesturing teenagers...

It royally sucks!

But that is the reality. It sucks and you have to suck it up if you want help, become a beggar and force yourself down the social scale in life to a notch above a person living on the street who most likely eats better because the quantity of dumpsters is more plentiful than the amount of money they give you to buy real food.


Milk cost = $4.00 or more
Bread cost = $2.00 or more
Can of Soup = #2.00 or more
Peanut Butter cost = $4.00 or more


4 items = $12.00 multiply that a couple of times and there is $100 worth of milk, soup and peanut butter sandwiches to live on for the month.

It's fucking stupid!


Humbling experiences in life come when you least expect them and are least prepared. They change the foundation of what you know not only about yourself but the world you live in.


Yeah that's true but at almost 60 years old who the feck wants to envelop that philosophy? I certainly do not want to see my parents having to go to the food bank or beg for help to pay their rent or end up on the street, especially not after they clothed, fed and sheltered me a good portion of my life.

It hurts so badly and I wish more than anything something would change for them. But it seems for them when it rains it pours and right now they are caught in a storm teetering on the edge of sanity and trying to keep their heads above the water that threatens to drown them.

Me, I get to sit back and watch helplessly. The most I can do is this -- blog it and only to make myself feel a tad better in getting out the emotions that cloud my heart with regret for them because I cannot help them monetary wise.

Every day there are more and more stories being shown about our seniors survival or lack of. Many seniors are now living on the street because the government wishes to help the young and seemingly forgets about our older generation (the ones who got us) here.

I guess I just don't want my parents to be another story.

Head over to conversations with moms and post your Friday Frustrations.

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Friday, July 3, 2009

friday frustrations: web design fun!



Hey Hey Hey, it's TGIF time! My fav day of the week because it's the furthest away from Monday which I hate.

So this weeks topic is web designing or rather blog designing. DH wanted a blog and I thought it would be a good idea for him, maybe help his memory out, his feelings on parenting with a brain injury which there isn't much info online on for that. I mean there is tons of stuff on TBI's but not on what it's like to parent as a survivor.

My BFF JF also asked for a blog. She really needed one, let me tell you. We sit here and chat, sometimes for hours on end about parenting and the kids and of course we laugh. We LAUGH hard! She has so much material to blog about she doesn't need to search for stuff like some of us (ahem) me.


So over this past week I took it upon myself to build both of their blogs for them. DH's blog is called The Forgetful Dad and he's quite happy with the turn out. He was looking for a nice, classic header and some dynamic stuff to make his site stand out and I think I hit the nail on the head for him. It's clean and very elegant to look at. At least I think so.

JF's blog is called The Shoeless Mommy and it has a fashion theme which I used to impliment for parenting stuff. Lil Miss and Mister are her kids. She has labels like accessories (friends & family) shoes (for being a single parent and dating) don't ask she'll explain it, and tons of other fun stuff.

It's now Friday and after a week of no sleep, late late nights coding and tweaking and making sure everything was set up right. I'm done finally. Both of them have twitter accounts so make sure you stop by their blogs and grab their buttons and give them a visit. I'm sure they will begin posting soon now that they can lol.

I love designing blogs on blogger because of the freedom it allows with HTML and templates and other stuff. And I really love designing banners and buttons, but it's time consuming and a bit hard on the eye muscles lol.

Still all in all it turned out good I think. Let me know what you think.

Happy Friday!




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Saturday, June 27, 2009

friday frustrations: mental depression cracks me up


So it's Friday which means I get to rant, right? right?

Well according to Conversations with Moms I do and since I follow them on Friday's I'm sticking to the game plan and the RANT BEGINS NOW...

Today was not a good day for me. By not a good day I mean I was emotional, unbalanced, irritated and moody one moment, and totally happy and bouncy ball the next.

I have chemical depression or rather a form of bipolar disorder to which I gleefully take magic happy pills that manage to keep me balanced throughout the year. That is until I...

A.) Either forget to take them.

B.) Take them too late at night and thus the effect just makes it so I can't sleep or

C.) Have to deal with the government because my pills ran out and red tape bullship means I have to wait to get them since the men behind that red tape pay for them.


Today was (C) and let me tell you it's not fun!

And the worst part is when Hockeydude, my loving and caring ten year old notices that mommy is not quite herself because she is sitting on the sofa blubbering and leaking uncontrollably over an episode of SVU she's already seen a million times, where a little girl gets killed by her own mother. To screaming at his brother for trying to put the cat in the dryer and threatening to take away his teeth brushing time (something Pickleboy loves) as a punishment!

Dude turns to me and says: "Mom do you need your happy pills?"

Okay I'm leaking again.

I hate feeling this way.

I hate having depression and mood swings.

I hate being on meds and the fact that taking the meds helps to control my condition.

And I most definitely hate that I have been dealing with this since I was a kid and realize it's not really going to get any better because there is just no cure for Bipolar Disorder or BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and that man truly SUCKS BIG DONKEY DUCKS!

I love my boys, more than breathing. Breathing is highly overrated anyhow. But I do -- love them so much and I hate it when I'm so tired (depressed) some days it's such a fight to even drag my ass bum out of bed to go downstairs to make them breakfast and be with them.

That in itself makes me sad enough to cry until I drown. It hurts me.

If it wasn't for DH and his ability to cope and understand with my disorder/mood swings/girlie moments where one moment I'm singing his praises and the next I'm telling him how unhappy he and the kids and the world makes me feel. I don't know what I would do.

You know most days I'm good. In fact I'm better than that -- I'm GREAT! I feel good inside and I'm happy and love being around my family and playing with my boys. The medication I'm on doesn't make me feel like a zombie or disconnected from my emotions in any way shape or form.

But other days, like today (when I don't have my pills) and I'm feeling down in the dirty dumps. It's so hard to even imagine being happy about anything and a struggle to crack a smile or feel in touch with myself.

I just want to feel NORMAL, you know?

Then Corky tells me: "Honey none of us are normal. Everyone is screwed up in one way or another. You get sad (depression). Dude can't sit still (mild ADD) Pickleboy can't always walk (Cerebral Palsy) and has a hard time with his social interactions (Asperger's) and I forget everything (Brain Injury).

Great! Leave it to DH to try to cheer me up by reminding me that both my boys have their own inner troubles and that he can't remember the last time he kissed me or said I love you (totally not his fault so no blame there).

Now I feel better.

I glance over at our cat (Thomas) sitting on the floor next to a plastic shopping bag. He isn't playing in the bag, pouncing on it or hiding inside it. No he's LICKING IT!

What can I say - We're a mixed bag of nuts.



Please leave me a comment if you are participating in Friday Frustrations or leave me a comment anyhow because I love reading them and then head over to CWM's and link your post.



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Friday, June 19, 2009

friday frustrations: dr. phil the return of jeremy


Ahhh TGIF everyone!

So yeah I'm hanging out at home today, after going to Jay's Sports Day at school. I'm feeling good about things, luving my boys and enjoying the day despite the drizzle that seems to be looming around us.

We don't often watch afternoon television, and especially not Dr. Phil, at least not anymore as I'm always busy on Twitter or here.

But I saw he was having on Jeremy and I remembered this story from a few years back about a little girl named Kaylee (his daughter) accused him of molesting her and hurting her.

Now Jeremy denied all allegations and still to this day denies them, despite failing a polygraph test which clearly identifies him as a pedophile and states he is lying.

So Dr. Phil did a recap on what has happened in the past two years since the story first broke. And Jeremy was arrested! They found child porn on his computer and the judge gave him like 180 days in jail, 500 community hours of service and like 200 days on house arrest. He also has to register as a sex offender and is not allowed to be around any children under the age of seventeen.

This frustrated me. Not because I wasn't happy that at least some justice was served. I just DON'T get IT! I don't get how someone can hurt their child or any child in such a malicious, disgusting and perverse manner. I don't get it.

When I was younger, like five. I was molested by our babysitter. He forced me to perform fallacio on him, pull down my pants and I'm sure other things to which thank God my memory blocked out.

Now it really messed me up for a very long time. When I hit puberty I had a very hard time with anger issues, boys and my feelings of depression. My parents tried hard to get me help but I refused to talk about it I guess; I'd suppressed the memories so deeply I thought mentally there was something wrong with me. And this lasted well into the first several years of my long term relationship with Jay's father.

It strikes me so that anyone could harm a child this way, let alone have sex with them. I mean it's not like a child can or will get anything out of the experience except for torture, pain and years of heartache.

Kaylee is apparently doing so much better now that her father is out of the picture says mom Kirsta who has her daughter seeing a psychologist to help her through this nightmare her father apparently put her through.


If you participate in Friday Frustrations head over to Conversations with Mom and post yours there and don't forget to leave me a comment with your link as well.




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Friday, June 12, 2009

friday frustrations: money woes



TGIF!!!! It's been a very long long week. Ever had one of those? Yeah only every week right?

Well for me this week it was especially long because we are broke. Funny how when you have money time seems to fly by with each shop you go to. But when there is no money you sit and wait... and wait... and yes once again wait.

We have two birthday's to go this weekend and no money to get presents which I really hate. I do not like my children showing up as the wayward kids from the block.

"Hi we are here for cake and ice cream and goodies but screw you and your present because all we could wrap up for you was a can of peas and a broken truck my Nana gave me last Christmas!"


My parents are stressed out right now. I mean stressed. Due to the economy as it is with many people; Dad lost his job. He's 57 years old and so it only made sense for the company to say "feck off you old dog thanks for your hard work these past years but in all honesty the money we pay you can be better put to use on the young guy we have coming in to take your place who will work for peanuts!"

My parents ended up losing a huge chunk of income along with their van they had been making monthly payments on for the past 2 years. Now they have no car, less food and their medications cost over $600 per month which because of the layoff they also have no medical coverage.

Friends ask us out but we can't go because we can't put fuel in the car to get to where we need to. Yesterday we went to pick up something from my grocery store for supper and Trace asked me if we could buy bananas. I said 'no' it wasn't in the budget. But the kicker was the conversation on the way home Thursday night I had with Jake who was more than glum because I couldn't afford for him to go and play laser tag with his friends this Sunday.


Jay: "Why do we have to pay for things?"


Me: "Because we do?"


Jay: Yeah but why? We can grow our own food, there are lots of people who can help, there is enough gas for the car for everyone. Why do we have to charge for stuff? Why can't it just be free?"


I wanted to laugh so hard but thought it better to just answer honestly. "Well people work and need to get paid for their jobs. It takes money to pay for rent and utilities. It cost money to run schools and houses and parks."


Jay: "Mom! Mom! I know this but why?"


Okay now I was frustrated. Jay is ten he knows why. He sounded like a three year old repeating himself and it was beginning to annoy me. I was already stressed trying to figure out how we were going to catch up on the bills, pay for things and buy the boys new shoes they desperately needed without this crap.


Me: "The world isn't free, Jay." I told him.


"It should be though. Instead of paying for everything maybe everyone should just give it away for free and keep giving it away to keep the world going."

Then it hit me. I had never thought of that before. A world where people worked at the job they wanted because they wanted not because of how much they get paid. Resources being utilized again and again by those who care. Food being grown and distributed, free gas, free water, free help.

No Money!

Okay I knew it was only a dream. That's why kids are so great. Their imagination and ability to see the world as it should be, not how it truly is. I miss thinking that way. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go because I need to get ready for the party and wrap my can of peas.

Have a great Friday!
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