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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

random tuesday: when will i learn?

Gosh!  Do you remember those days?  Girls sitting around and chatting about boys, laughing and giggling, telling each other secrets, bonding in ways that only girls can bond?

Yep, okay me either.

I didn't have a lot of friends growing up and I was okay with that.  I really was.  Sure at times it was lonely, but I always felt comfortable being with myself, reading a book or writing.  Sometimes I missed the parties, drinking and doing stupid things.  But I did that with the select group of individuals I still call my friends to this day, and now we are all grown up.

Or at least I felt like a grown up until yesterday.

I put myself into a situation that I really hate.  A situation between friends, threw out my opinion and well it came back to bite me and didn't make me feel very good at the same time.  I should have known better.  I should have just kept my mouth shut, but I was defending someone and have since come to realize I cannot fight other people's battles for them, even if I have the best intentions at heart because something always goes wrong...

So I spent the day and night stewing over this whole, my foot up my ass and I realized that is the shitty thing about doing something you know you are going to regret.  There is no going back to fix it.  You can only move forward and learn from your mistakes and well -- in my case DUCT TAPE your fucking mouth shut next time you feel the need to vomit your opinions all over people you don't know.

Ahem - sorry to the people I hurt with words that were not meant to be hurtful.  Meg I apologize if what you thought I was saying was to be nasty or hurtful or condescending in any way.  DA I already wrote you an email.

And to Sparkee, I love you doll but I should not have interfered, despite trying to help you and feeling angry at not how you were treated but what was said more than anything.  I am not your keeper and need to realize you can fight your battles on your own.

Do I feel any better after posting this?

No.  That is the wonderful thing about inserting your foot up your ass... you walk funny for a while.  Ask me in a week how I'm doing and maybe my stride will improve!

If you wish to participate in RANDOM TUESDAY then head on over to KEELY at the UNmom and post your linky there.  Stop to read her too because she is so funny and you're bound to stay a while.


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