Dear Computer: I want you to know how much I adore having you. However, you've been slow lately corresponding with me. It seems almost as if you don't want to spend any time with me doing all the fun things we love to do, like web design, blogging and playing farmville. What can I do to make you feel better? I've helped you get rid of your colds. I've babied you by removing all your extra coats of clutter, giving you lots of free space to run around. What else can I do?
Dear JP: There is nothing you can do. I'm tired. Can't you understand I hate farming and going to your cafe. It gives me a headache which is why I shut down for a nap. I need to SLEEP! You over work me daily. You don't care about my feelings. You clutter my bedroom, leaving your games and toys lying around expecting me paint.net when you want and answer all your emails while you are out. It's tiring and I just feel you are being unfair!
Dear Computer: I am sorry you feel that way. I had no idea. I realize you are not at the top of your game. I realize age is setting in and perhaps I am asking too much from you lately. But I have jobs to do. I have people counting on me. People counting on you. Isn't there a way you can find it in yourself to push yourself just a bit? I promise to pick up my games and not leave them lying around. I promise to paint only three days a week instead of daily. I promise not to curse at you or take you for granted. Just please find your second wind and help me out a little. I can't afford to replace you and I don't really want to. So what do you say.
Dear JP: CTRL + ALT + DELETE!